I Wanna Hold Your Hand

The anxiety I felt going into the testing that was to be completed last week was silly. Just plain silly.

I had heard crazy horror stories about other womens' HSG test experiences. The pain, the cramping, the crying. So, of course I wasn't excited about going alone. I was told that having someone there to help you focus on your breathing or having a hand to squeeze was optimal. Fortunately, I have the best mother in the world. She offered to miss work and come with me to my appointment. Thank you, Mom!

My HSG x-ray experience was quite the opposite of every story I heard....

The following conversation occurred after checking-in at the hospital:

"Jessica?", the nurse called my name. Both my mom and I stood up to head back to the x-ray room. "I'm sorry, but only the patient can come back.", said the nurse.
"Oh, okay.", says my mom as she sits back down.
As the nurse and I walk down the hallway I ask, "Are you sure she can't come with me?"
"No, I'm sorry, she cannot.", she replies.
"Wait, so she....ummm...okay.", says a 32-year-old me.

Yep, you're never too old to need your mommy.

Once I get over the fact that my mom can't come with me to hold my hand, I'm already undressed from the waste down and wearing 4 layers on the top half of my body. Next, I find that I'm extremely thankful for the warm blanket on my lap while I sit on the cold exam table and wait for the tech and doctor to come in to the room.

The radiologist tech enters the room first and explains that the procedure only takes 10-15 minutes, half the time I was originally told by fellow women in hardship. This news immediately puts me at ease.

Before I know it, the doctor enters the room and I'm in that position. (You know that position ladies. The one where you know you're in the correct position if you're extremely uncomfortable.)

The doctor starts by telling me what is going to happen, step by step. And, step by step she keeps me informed.

For those of you who don't know what an HSG entails here's the quick version: it starts with a small catheter being placed into your uterus, a balloon at the end of the catheter is then inflated at the base of your uterus to keep the dye flowing upwards, lastly the dye is released into your uterus and travels up and out through your fallopian tubes. Both the inflation of the balloon and the release of the dye are supposed to cause cramping.

It's at this point that a picture is taken of your reproductive organs while you lay flat on your back, you are then asked to roll onto your right hip, exposing your left fallopian tube and ovary for a better picture, and then the opposite hip. One more photo is taken of the full deal for good measure.

And you better believe that I watched that screen like a hawk. From beginning to end. That is, when the tech wasn't in my way. Did I mention I love science?

That was it. Done and done. The cramping was minimal. The staff was polite, delicate (both were women) and knowledgeable. And no backwards movement of blue fluid was had.

I made a quick trip to the restroom to put on a diaper sized pad, I was able to redress myself and head on my way out the door.

There was one moment of panic between the radiology office and the elevator. I looked at my mom and started talking quickly in a high pitched voice. I thought for sure my khaki work pants were about to turn blue, starting at the top of my inseam and end at my ankles. Reminding me of the diaper commercials you see on TV with the blue fluid. Turns out it was just another false alarm.

My doctor called the next day with my results. The x-ray of my fallopian tubes came back 'totally normal'. His words. He then reminded me that sometimes this testing does have a therapeutic effect on fallopian tubes, i.e. cleaning out the lines.

Nothing like a good flush to maintain a system. Can't hurt!